Nap Segment Insights

Hello and welcome to the very first edition of Snowy’s Nap Segment Insights, a weekly series dedicated to everyone’s favorite type of seg: napping!

Today we’ll be going over a very important question: What exactly is a nap seg? An excuse to steal food from the staff lounge? Slacking on the job to protest the cruel working conditions for the staff? Lighting a campfire in order to satisfy your inner arsonist?

(Hint: It’s all of the above.)

Nap segs are much more than a passive-aggressive way to get back at Elp for not paying us, though. Not only are they obviously superior to the other two types of segs, they’re fun! Campfires, roasting marshmallows, eating cookies, selling puffles on the black market, what’s not to love? You’d have to be some sort of cookie-hoarder not to join in. Or maybe you just don’t like lighting a campfire indoors. Either way, shame on you.

A vital part of any nap seg is the snacks. We’ve got several in HF: cookies, piña coladas, garlic bread that was not stolen from Barnito’s house, hot chocolate, but best of all, the s’more! Tune in next week to learn all about the special nap seg recipes, exclusive from the staff lounge. We’ll be going over the type of lock that’s on the door, how to pick locks, stealing the food, relocking the door, erasing the security camera footage, and more!

A note: This article is NOT to be seen as officially sponsored by any corporation, non-profit or otherwise. However, there’s no rule against that and it’s not like I’m being paid for this, so what the heck?

Some of you may be aware of the fact that puffles steal our snacks during nap segs. This has been a difficult problem, but we’re the Help Force, after all. We help the puffles gain some common sense by forcing them to stay away from our campfire with the all new, Help Force-exclusive PUFFLE-AWAY SPRAY: GUARANTEED TO KEEP SMALL BALLS OF FLUFF AT A DISTANCE.* I’m not saying that this author is biased, but I am getting paid to write about PUFFLE-AWAY SPRAY, which is more than Elp ever gave me. You know where my loyalties lie.

That’s all for this week’s insight. Curious about anything nap or snack related? Comment below and I’ll write all about it! Until next week, comrades.

*Disclaimer: The makers of PUFFLE-AWAY SPRAY, i.e. Penguins Incorporated™, are not to be held liable for any of the following: a sudden urge to eat puffle-o’s, stamp fever, sudden incurable JTS, growth of a first, second, or third tail, loss of speech, loss of vision, loss of friends and/or acquaintances, loss of appetite, or loss of pet puffle. Penguins Incorporated™ is in no way affiliated with Penguins Incarcerated™. If you have questions or concerns regarding the product PUFFLE-AWAY SPRAY, submit an official query to Penguins Incorporated™, HR Dept. Product not guaranteed to keep any sort of wildlife away, fictional or otherwise. If you or your puffle experiences a loss of fur and/or a loss of love for one another, you may be entitled to financial compensation. Product available in the continental USA and in the parts of Europe that speak French.

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