Cinco de Mayo: An Exercise in Futility

Those of you who have been active during US hours for the past few weeks have seen Elp talk about something called a “Cinco de Mayo,” and you’ve also seen Snowy complain every single time. Snowy is right. Allow me to explain.

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Helper Study: Vol 2

After spending a few months observing Helpers in their natural habitat, I’m back with more information on them. You can find my very scientific research below, and the previous edition of this post here.

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Victory Buffet

Comrades, we have successfully defeated Water Vikings in the finals of Ausia Arena and now it’s time to celebrate. Today, I will be showcasing some of HF’s favourite foods that will be in this buffet. Let’s see what we’re eating today.

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Murder Mystery: Acodo’s Death

Before we begin, the previous murderer was SNOWY


Anyways lets continue

Greetings Helpers! Welcome to my game Murder Mystery! Here is how it will work: I will be giving you a small scenario and you will have to guess who the murderer of the scenario is.

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The Problem With Roblox Recruits

Several armies have been using Roblox to recruit new members for a while. Although this form of recruiting is often easier and less risky than other forms, some problems still come with it. Roblox recruiting is a trade-off, and it’s essential to recognize the advantages and disadvantages of it.

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Why You Shouldn’t Pay Your Taxes (Yet)

Our glorious, gracious motherland thrives off the taxes of its hard-working residents. However, this prosperity has only been given to the Commanders and other high-ranking officials. The tax money that gets collected from us hard-working soldiers does not benefit us, but rather it benefits the bourgeois scum at the top of the HF pyramid scheme. This is why we should not and will not pay our taxes. For legal reasons, I am required to say that this post is completely satirical and that we should all pay our dues to our glorious, gracious motherland.

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PSA: Pay Your Taxes

Tax season is upon us! Have you paid your taxes yet? No? No worries! This quick, easy, pain-free guide will help you get those taxes paid so you can go back to recruiting all day.

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Snowy Wanted for Crimes Against the State

For weeks, comrade Jo has been trying to invade comrade Snowy, through dozens of events and battles. Each and every time, comrade Snowy somehow managed to escape, evading comrade Jo’s capture. We cannot let this continue to happen as her arrest is crucial for winning Ausia Arena.

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Murder Mystery: Desireus’s Coconuts

Greetings Helpers! Welcome to my game Murder Mystery! Here is how it will work; I will be giving you a small Scenario and you will have to guess who the Murderer of the scenario is.

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Totally Legit Interviews: Javi

Hi Helpers, and welcome to Totally Legit Interviews! In this series, I interview an unsuspecting Helper and then publish the interview with some… revisions. My first victim is Javi.

Everyone in Help Force knows who Javi is. Her gambling single-handedly keeps the economy going, she spreads the SUS disease to keep things interesting, and her tax evasion skills even rival mine. I woke her up in the middle of the night and bribed her with a cookie to get this interview. Below you can read it, which is completely unedited except for the parts I changed. Enjoy!

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