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Pizza Tower Review | Topping Frenzy Edition

What is up my brothers and sisters? Zenishira here. Who’s hungry for pizza? I know that I am, as a staff member I do not get any food other than the crumbles I find under the table. Recently, I’ve heard of a place called Peppino’s Pizzeria, but when I called to order they did not pick up. Apparently there has been some incident, some giant pizza with a face threatened to destroy Peppino’s Pizzeria with a giant laser. Poor Peppino is alreadt in debt, he didn’t need that guy. He has to hurry up, chase Pizzaface and climb the dangerous…

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Pizza Tower is an action-packed 2D platformer made by Tour de Pizza. The game heavily draws inspiration from the Wario Land series, but also Sonic the Hedgehog, Jazz Jackrabbit, and the art style is akin to 90s cartoon shows such as Ren and Stimpy. All of these combine to result in one of the wackiest adventures you’ll ever see.

Our protagonist is a middle-aged Italian chef with anxiety and anger issues named Peppino Spaghetti. (Yes, that’s his real name, don’t ask).

Peppino sports a white tank top worn over a black T-shirt, black pants, and a white chef’s hat. He is the owner of Peppino’s Pizza. Despite being pretty fat, he is actually very fast and very strong. Peppino’s moveset is very diverse, most of his moves actually allow him to conserve his momentum. He can run and jump, body slam and grab his enemies, uppercut and most importantly taunt, where strikes a cool pose. However, if Peppino taunts just as an enemy tries to attack him, he can parry the attack and escape unscathed.

Peppino can also transform in many different ways, and each level has its own unique transformation to serve as a gimmick. For example, when he pulls out a sword from a stone, lightning strikes him and he becomes a knight. In the farm level, he can use a chicken to attack his enemies with.

The game has 20 levels, split in 4 floors. Each floor has a different boss you must defeat, but in order to unlock the boss door, you must give money to  Mr. Sticks, money you earn after saving the Toppins. At first, you are allowed to explore the level in depth, get treasure, points, find secrets, and all that jazz.

At the end of each level, you have to destroy a giant pillar named John.

Once you smash him into the ground, you have to GET OUTTA HERE!!!

 

A mechanic that is also borrowed from Wario Land 4 is a countdown that starts once you reach the end of the level. You have to race to the entrance in a limited amount of time. Failing to do so will wake up Pizzaface, who will start chasing you. Roads that have been previously blocked off are now open, and some of the paths you’ve previously trekked are now closed, so you have to have quick reflexes.

Why doesn't pizzaface just kill peppino here? Is he stupid? : r/PizzaTower

Once you enter the entrance gate, you will be graded with a rank based on how well you performed, with D being the worst and S being the best. Oh wait, I forgot to mention there is a Lap 2 hidden near the entrance of each level, which allows you to get the much coveted P rank! To get the P rank, one must collect all the Toppins, find all secrets, get the treasure and do Lap 2 all without dropping the Combo, it’s a very hard challenge fit only for true Italians. Getting the P rank always feels rewarding, as you get to see Peppino do a cool Pose, with enemies in the background looking at him in awe.

Pizza Tower - All P-Ranks Damageless - YouTube

Pizza Tower may be one of the best platformers I’ve ever played in my life, probably the best game of 2023. For long I have waited an indie game that could keep me playing for hours and hours on end, a game with a charming art style, goofy sense of humor and a kicker soundtrack to boot, have a listen!

That’s all for today, folks. Thank you for reading this blogpost, have a good one!

Oh, if you’ve read so far, then I have to congratulate you. I have a certain request to make. You see, I need people to give me games to review. DM me with your suggestions of what I should review and if I have played it, then I will review it. If not, then I will play it first and then make a review. I want to see what you guys love to play and I want to review them. Peace!


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