The Help Force

Welcome back to another edition of the stinkiest polls in Club Penguin Army history. Despite it being two years since he retired, Jayden’s stink still prevails strong enough for these polls to continue. However, in the previous few weeks he consistently wrote a total of zero posts, which invited a host of complaints from people. I am not saying complaints are bad, after all that’s just a normal thing for every single stinky Helper out there to do the moment something happens. But since I got annoyed by the complaints, here you go, a substitute for the Jellyfish’s Stinky Polls.

I chopped up five live jellyfishes into tiny bits and sprinkled them over this post to make it extra stinky. To make sure that the stink stays strong for 30 days, I also added a gentle garnishing of curry. Why curry? It’s not because curry is also stinky, it’s just that curry adds strength to anything its coupled with. You should try it sometime, it’ll help you get a better life. Just kidding (not).

This week, we will not be criticizing the responders’ opinions. We will be dividing the responders’ into two groups based on their ranks, criticizing their opinions, and scoring them accordingly to see which group is better. Now obviously, the best grouping would be staff vs junior staff. Why? Because those two groups are the only relevant group of people in the Help Force. Yes, I know its a bit of a stretch to call the juniors relevant but I need to grant them that status for the sake of the post.

From the Junior Staff team, we have Selene, Beanieval, Winter Storm, Chimoop, Jo, Nightfury, Zenishira, Elia, and Sen!

From the Staff team, we have Snowy, Desireus, Mayathefirst, ROOBOO and Javi!

The Junior Staff have more members on their team cuz it gives them a better chance of surviving this… and yet I have a feeling that they won’t. So let me explain my scoring system. Every time a team member presents a valid opinion, their team gets +1. And if they manage to expose their invalid opinions, their team gets -1. Thus, the Juniors have a chance to win this despite their irrelevance due to their sheer numbers.

To be honest, there’s no correct answer to this question. Sike, it’s OBVIOUSLY Coconut Curry Smoothie. For all those who voted Ketchup Cookie Milkshake, you need to reconsider your life choices. You have absolutely no sense of avoiding danger, and I GUARANTEE that mixing ketchup and cookies and milkshake will result in some extremely discomforting responses from your tummy. But ofc you didn’t even consider that possibility, since you were also stupid enough to voluntarily participate in this poll. Lol. The Juniors take the lead, beating the Staff team by a score of 4-2. The Staff almost won, but ROOBOO and Javi killed their chances.

This was actually more of a poll than any other question on this series. Somehow, Choco has irked enough people to get the highest number of votes here, so this question goes to the Staff members. Why? Because they were good enough to not even be nominated for the ban! Yes its just that rigged.

The obvious correct answer here would be the Ice Warriors. IW are really amazing people and great allies too, but the Help Force also has a history of going into overtimes against them. Historically, the IW is the most influential enemy HF has ever had and beating them in a tournament would be an accomplishment for any staff member. But obviously, there’s also the idiots who voted “I don’t wanna attend cuz I’m taking my grandma to the vet.” This option gets an extra -2 points for your team along with the bonus of not picking the IW! Thanks to nightfury choosing the option, the Juniors lost this one heavily to the Staff with a final of -9 points! Great work Staff on not completely ignoring the HF history.

It pains me to see so many of the staff going for the most cringe option in that list. “Unleash the Power of Helping” REALLY MFERS?!?! That is your PREFERENCE?!?! You guys have absolutely no sense at all. FIGHT FOR GLORY was obviously the best and most valid option here, but even Help Force Best Force would’ve been better than the cringe motto chosen by kid Ayan (who was obviously going through a bad phase). The Staff won this poll once again!

Now I’m feeling too lazy to even comment on the horrors committed in the last two questions, so I’m just gonna post them here and let you readers comment on it in the comments section below. Yes, I am doing this despite knowing you are a bunch of lazy stinkies who won’t actually bother to comment anything. I don’t really care about that, but I’d like to remind you that commenting on posts gets you promotions.

Filed under: Help Force CP, Jellyfish's Stinky Poll, Web Series Tagged: | Jellyfish, Polls, Scorp