Spill The Tea – Wynn

Welcome to Spill The Tea! A column full of jokes, gossip, and entertainment! The fourth edition of this column, hosted by Delitager, brings Wynn to the spotlight.

Wynnifred Ashgrow, more commonly known as Wynn, is the current Commander of the Help Force. Wynn earned her promotion on December 4th, 2021, after all four of the previous Commanders stepped down from their responsibility together. Following her promotion, Wynn, along with Snowy who was promoted shortly after, successfully helped the army transition from a war that last over a month to more peaceful, prosperous times. She is infamous for her record of staying up 24/7 so as to work for the Help Force.

Eh, everyone knows that army stuff… but who is the real Wynn, hiding behind that intimidating leader persona? Is the confident, powerful Commander we see each day truly what she is like? Of course, I would have to interview her to find that out. However, turns out that Wynn is very stealthy when it comes to avoiding interviews. After almost a week full of attempts to contact her, I finally managed to kidnap her with the help of the very awesome 2ic Scorpion Demon (we used retirement as a bait to lure her). Now that I finally have her at gunpoint, we can get the tea that we’ve been waiting for.


Hey Wynn! Welcome to Spill The Tea, how are you doing?

Wynn: HII HELPERS I LUV YOU ALL AND SCORP TOO, HE TOTALLY ISN’T POINTING A GUN AT ME RIGHT NOW! I’m doing amazing, finally able to rest since you locked me in that basement. Ropes are a bit too tight though.

The rescue squad is probably on their way…

Scorp: lol no

Delightful! So first question, how did you join the Help Force?

Phew, a simple one to answer! I joined exactly two years and 1 day ago. I met some penguins all dressed green for St Patrick’s day, I joined them at the event and after it, somebody told me what to Google to join and here I am.

Whoever did that, you are amazing, thanks for getting us such an incredible slave. So what some interesting things that has happened to you in Help Force?

It was probably Ken who recruited me, he was a marshal back then I think.
Tons of interesting things happened to me, I wouldn’t have stayed otherwise. Some may be just funny takeovers, like Evil Duolingo, some are more serious and the people that were through it with me made it amazing and shaped me to become who I am.

What is the first incident that comes to your mind when you think about it all?

I would say one of the most interesting periods was the Silver Rush 1.0 war. That’s when I first started learning what it takes to lead an army.

Do you ever wonder if the staff should be freed from suffering some day? 

Wynn: I did wonder. But I came to a conclusion that if I suffered that much, and even more than you do right now, why would I spare you suffering will make you stronger! 💪

Scorp: That is true

Wynn: If Ayan was here he’d say “trust the process”

OO btw look at this picture of Archana’s two dogs! 

Scorp: lol that’s me when Dynasty tells me they shouldn’t be moderated


Yes. Is there anything that makes you regret being commander?

I love when people salute to me every time I pass by and that I have so many simps like for example Vanish :luv:

Such royalty, how do you feel about placing at #1 in both of the HF13 awards this year?

Wynn: Did you tell her to ask this question scorp? I refused to answer last time he tried to interview me about it

No isn’t an option waves gun

Wynn: We have many hardworking people in the server, starting with staff, high command and of course Snowy! It was a nice suprise and I’m really happy that so many helpers seems to have trust in my efforts. Thank you and again, congratulations to everyone who made it to the list and who was nominated – it is something to be proud of!

I dont know what to say so, how did you come up with your name?

In original CP I was using my friends penguin so when I moved to CPR I didn’t take the name with me. I was having hard time coming up with a new name, so eventually I started experimenting with Google translator. For the reason I don’t understand now, I chose Pikkewynn, which “penguin” in Afrikaans. When I joined HF it got shorten to Wynn

Imagine setting a Google Translate name, were you high?

I didn’t have access to staff’s hidden supplies so highly unlikely. I was just cringe

Welp, so I heard that you are often so high you get confused between staff members names and British cities. Can you tell us more about this?

Wynn: I have a right to remain silent. Not my fault though that some staff members have names so complicated the phone autocorrects it :meh:

Scorp: How the fuck do you go from Scorpion Demon to Southampton?

Lmao, what did you think about Help Force when you first joined?

I could smell a strong curry scent and heard loud tuba playing in the background but people were so nice to me that I stayed. Everyone was being fed those days so I had no idea what I just signed up for
There were also tons of raccoons making a mess in the main hall

“Everyone was being fed those days” Sounds rigged.

But it was mostly curry

Why not these days

The HF public debt rose too high since we switched points system for sapphires system. Points weren’t that expensive

Still rigged anyway, how do you manage your work and CPA?

I got sent for a training to monks in Tibet, they taught me how to stop sleeping. Since I don’t sleep, I have more time!

Very great for your health, now, do you know what is my favourite flower?

Fuck. wait… I dont recon you telling me though :meh: How am I supposed to know

Incompetent commanders istg…

Now, you won’t let scorp publish that question or somebody is suffering the consequences once you let me out of this basement

The only thing we’re suffering is your Juanita Typing Syndrome. What is your favourite food?

Curry, of course! And tomatoes

Ew tomatoes, anyways, what are some things you like to do when you’re free?

My greatest passion is sailing and hiking in the mountains, but I can’t do that every day obviously, plus covid is a problem. I like reading, watching movies, learning new things.
Wait I should have answered that as a commander I don’t have the thing called free time. What even is that

HIKING, that’s the best thing but I have no mountains around. What kind of music do you like?

Tuba playing and staff screams in the background
Very progressive

Great taste! What is your favourite task you do in your day to day life?

Sipping tea :scorpcoffee:

What’s your favourite TV show or movie?

I don’t desire to participate in entertainment created for mere mortals – club penguin drama is all I need. Some people tell me to touch grass but i don’t have such needs

Me too, but I don’t need club penguin drama. Last question, what was your favourite thing to do in college/school

I think i was one of those people who actually liked learning. Not all subjects of course and with not all teachers but i wasn’t suffering either. I’m an introvert so i would rather sit with a book and sip my tea than socialize much :needhelp:

Lol, alright do you have anything to say to the readers before we end

Thank you for the great time in the basement group chat and thank you all for being part of our Blue Family :luv: Each of you is special and works hard to make it a home for us all! I salute you :salute: Eat your curry!

Now can you lower that gun?

Scorp: shoot her, we got what we needed

A huge shoutout to Archana’s dogs, Tina and Snow, for making this post even more special!

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